Common sense on leave for weekend

So. It's Friday night. The Captain and I have decided to have a relaxing evening playing games and eating Hala bread in honor of Sabbath. We are in the middle of our second game of Ticket to Ride when we get a call from his cousin, Elyse. Would we like to come over for games after vespers? Please. Need she even ask? We would be there with bells on. The evening skips by and soon it's time to leave. I decide that I need to spruce up my appearance before I set foot in public and pop into the bathroom for a brief interlude with my straightener. About a minute later the captain pokes his face in the bathroom door as I stand waiting for it to heat up. It seems to be taking a long time, as is often the case when you are trying to go somewhere. I look into his eyes and they say to me, “Can we go now pleeease? It’s time to plunder!” “Just a minute,” I say grinning. “I’m just waiting for it to warm up.” At this, I pass my fingers close to the ceramic plates. Too close. Searing pain shoots up my finger. “Argh!” I say in a truly piratey fashion.
“Oh honey!” says my captain. “Are you okay? Here let me get you something for that.” He disappears into the kitchen for a moment as I stand staring in disbelief at my finger. As if I can’t believe what it’s just done. “Stupid. Stupid. Stupid,” I say shaking my head. The captain returns with Aloe in hand and squirts some onto my finger. The rest of my hair is straightened without mishap and we exit stage left to the party.
We arrive at the gathering and are warmly greeting by cousin and cousins’ tall bearded Canadian boyfriend with broken jaw. He towers at 6’7” and rumoredly broke his jaw from falling from that height. Me thinks it is a lie but it makes for a good story anyway.
As the rest of the guests arrive the captain and I behave like true married types and tuck ourselves into a discreet corner in the kitchen and explore the tea options. Before long I’ve kicked back a glass of pomegranate tea and decided to have another. I stand up and holding my glass in one hand I reach for the ladle. As I bring it close to my glass I immediately see a problem. The ladle is bigger that the top of my mug. But instead of putting my glass down and reposition my hand to hold onto the handle like a normal person, I sens the ladle on a crash course for the mug. And what happens? Scalding water is poured down the side of the glass and consequently over my fingers. Now at this point, most people would put the ladle back into the pot of water, put the glass down and reposition their hand. Sadly, I am not a normal person and I continue to pour the hot water down over my hand, all the while jumping about and saying, “Oh! Ah! Hot water! On my hand. Ow. Ow. Ow.” The jumping and flailing about results in further splashing and scalding until I return the cup safely to the counter top. As you can imagine this little outburst has drawn quite a bit of attention. The giant is greatly concerned. I am hugely embarrassed and lapse into a bit of fevered silence. And my captain? Evidently his mothering was used up with our first bout of the night. He is sitting in his chair. Laughing. My hero.