THE MUSIC BOARD courtesy of Nothing is True.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Magic
Here's a little bit of fun for you music lovers out there. Oh, and people with coffee breaks too. Ah, and also for people with boring jobs. Or awesome ones. This will be good for you too.
Jasper Eats Homework
So Michael left Jasper alone in the apartment for about 20 minutes today to go down to the school to get a massage. When he got home Jasper had torn into a stack of papers Michael was grading. This means he get's to tell his students tomorrow that his dog ate their homework.
Best. Ever.
Best. Ever.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Jasper Redecorates
So the Captain and I were bad parents this week. Last Sunday we made plans to play paintball with a military friend of ours who was transferring off the island. My limited experience with paintball told me that the adventure would have us out of the house for 2-3 hours and that it would be perfectly acceptable for us to leave Jasper alone for that time. Well, it took us a little longer than expected. When we stood in front of our door 7 hours later ripe with bruises, dread overtook us. "Oh please Lord. Let us still have a living room."
When we opened the door... oh I wish we had taken a picture. It was pure chaos. There stood Jasper surrounded by all sorts of rubbish, looking up at us as if to say, "Hello parents!! Look what I did to the living room! Don't you just love it?!" The rascal had taken it upon himself to pee four times on the carpet, gnaw through our Rosetta Stone headset and the power chord to Michael's computer and toss paper all over the living room. It turns out that the paper we found came from Michael's Bible, which lay in a state of disarray surrounded by family history and preface pages. The cover had been torn from the binding and a chunk had been taken out of the spine but upon close examination we discovered that no text had been damaged so Michael dusted it off and took it to school where it would be safe.
Looking at the mess we were astonished but not angry. I mean, what can you really do at that point? It was our fault that we had left him alone for 7 hours and while he knows he's not supposed to pee on the carpet there was no point in scolding him because he would have no idea what it was for. So we picked up the pieces and resolved to put EVERYTHING up the next time we left the house. Absolutely everything.
When we opened the door... oh I wish we had taken a picture. It was pure chaos. There stood Jasper surrounded by all sorts of rubbish, looking up at us as if to say, "Hello parents!! Look what I did to the living room! Don't you just love it?!" The rascal had taken it upon himself to pee four times on the carpet, gnaw through our Rosetta Stone headset and the power chord to Michael's computer and toss paper all over the living room. It turns out that the paper we found came from Michael's Bible, which lay in a state of disarray surrounded by family history and preface pages. The cover had been torn from the binding and a chunk had been taken out of the spine but upon close examination we discovered that no text had been damaged so Michael dusted it off and took it to school where it would be safe.
Looking at the mess we were astonished but not angry. I mean, what can you really do at that point? It was our fault that we had left him alone for 7 hours and while he knows he's not supposed to pee on the carpet there was no point in scolding him because he would have no idea what it was for. So we picked up the pieces and resolved to put EVERYTHING up the next time we left the house. Absolutely everything.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Casualties
It seems to me that when people get puppies they complain about them tearing up shoes, socks, underwear, furniture, or their favorite (insert item here). While Jasper has shredded more than his share of toilet paper and training pads he really hasn't been terribly destructive when it comes to personal items. That was until a few days ago.
It was Sunday morning and I had an early shift at the coffee shop. Michael was sound asleep (as most people are at 5 in the morning on a Sunday) when he heard a colossal crash come from inside the bathroom. He pulled himself out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom to find that Jasper, no doubt fascinated by my dangling necklaces, had pulled my jewelry tree off the counter and sent it crashing to the floor sending my bangles flying hither and yon.
When the mess had been cleaned up Michael went about the process of trying to match up earrings. One set had been completely demolished, and several others were missing their mates. When I came home later and surveyed the damage I found that Jasper had really only been responsible for ruining two sets and that the other singular earrings had been that way for awhile.
"Now where have their matches gone?" I wondered. There has to be a place for wayward earrings like there is for socks who visit the dryer. I don't know how it happens, but it always seems to. You have a pair of earrings that you just love and then one day one of them goes missing, never to be seen or heard from again. And then the question arrises, what do you do with its mate? Do you keep it in hopes that one day the other will turn up? (Which never happens) Do you keep it in memory of what you once had? Do you try and make one that would work as a stand in? I think someone needs to come up with some clever ideas on things we can do with single earrings.
It was Sunday morning and I had an early shift at the coffee shop. Michael was sound asleep (as most people are at 5 in the morning on a Sunday) when he heard a colossal crash come from inside the bathroom. He pulled himself out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom to find that Jasper, no doubt fascinated by my dangling necklaces, had pulled my jewelry tree off the counter and sent it crashing to the floor sending my bangles flying hither and yon.
When the mess had been cleaned up Michael went about the process of trying to match up earrings. One set had been completely demolished, and several others were missing their mates. When I came home later and surveyed the damage I found that Jasper had really only been responsible for ruining two sets and that the other singular earrings had been that way for awhile.
"Now where have their matches gone?" I wondered. There has to be a place for wayward earrings like there is for socks who visit the dryer. I don't know how it happens, but it always seems to. You have a pair of earrings that you just love and then one day one of them goes missing, never to be seen or heard from again. And then the question arrises, what do you do with its mate? Do you keep it in hopes that one day the other will turn up? (Which never happens) Do you keep it in memory of what you once had? Do you try and make one that would work as a stand in? I think someone needs to come up with some clever ideas on things we can do with single earrings.
Monday, March 14, 2011
30 Before 30
1. 4 hair colors in one year
2. Shave my head
3. 2nd tattoo
4. Study ballet
5. Join a flash mob
6. Take a last minute flight
7. Take a trip with the girls
8. Write and publish a children's book
9. Secret Goal
10. Be able to do 10 pull ups
11. Figure out which eyeshadow works for me
12. Become bilingual
13. Slap someone in the face. Hard.
14. Go on a cattle drive
15. Buy a piece of art
16. Learn hard shoe Irish dance
17. Start my own business
18. Pursue a patent
19. Improve my knitting skills
20. Get a dog
21. Be a waitress
22. Take up yoga
23. Be someone's bridesmaid
24. Buy a live animal at the grocery store and set it FREE!
25. Take an ultralight ride
26. Go to Greece
27. Learn all the words to a rap song
28. Do the splits
29. Violate an unspoken social rule
30. Have a murder mystery party
2. Shave my head
3. 2nd tattoo
4. Study ballet
5. Join a flash mob
6. Take a last minute flight
7. Take a trip with the girls
8. Write and publish a children's book
9. Secret Goal
10. Be able to do 10 pull ups
11. Figure out which eyeshadow works for me
12. Become bilingual
13. Slap someone in the face. Hard.
14. Go on a cattle drive
15. Buy a piece of art
16. Learn hard shoe Irish dance
17. Start my own business
18. Pursue a patent
19. Improve my knitting skills
20. Get a dog
21. Be a waitress
22. Take up yoga
23. Be someone's bridesmaid
24. Buy a live animal at the grocery store and set it FREE!
25. Take an ultralight ride
26. Go to Greece
27. Learn all the words to a rap song
28. Do the splits
29. Violate an unspoken social rule
30. Have a murder mystery party
Friday, March 11, 2011
Tsunami watch
Hey all! Michael and I just wanted to send out a quick word to all of our family and friends to let you know that as of 11:11 p.m. Thursday evening WE ARE ALIVE and doing just fine. (Well Jasper is trying to attack us but that can't be helped.)
The homeland sirens went off at 9 when Daddy called. He was watching the 11:00 news when he was bombarded with reels from the Japan earthquake. "Hey, I just wanted to call to let you guys know that Hawaii has had a Tsunami watch issued." "Really?" Michael and I had been out on date night and had no idea what was happening. By 10 p.m. when the Tsunami evacuation sirens went off we were not part of the panicked hoard.
The homeland sirens went off at 9 when Daddy called. He was watching the 11:00 news when he was bombarded with reels from the Japan earthquake. "Hey, I just wanted to call to let you guys know that Hawaii has had a Tsunami watch issued." "Really?" Michael and I had been out on date night and had no idea what was happening. By 10 p.m. when the Tsunami evacuation sirens went off we were not part of the panicked hoard.
It's kinda fun really. We're having a good time watching live coverage from the safety of our 3rd story apartment. I texted my stand-in boss at 10:15, "Hey, sorry it's so late, but is it safe to say with the tsunami warning that Peet's will be closed tomorrow?" His reply, "No, we'll be open as long as we can. What time is it scheduled for?" "3 a.m." "Ok. At 4:30 we'll know. lol. If Wikes is drowned, no work."
I may get fired tomorrow.
We love you and will try and keep you updated!
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